


Everybody Has Bad Dreams

by Andria_Stilinski_Reid_Stark



Series: Spencer loves Aaron [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-26 10:14:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17743982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andria_Stilinski_Reid_Stark/pseuds/Andria_Stilinski_Reid_Stark
Summary: Hotchner learns that he needs to talk about his feelings.  Whether it’s hard or not.





	Everybody Has Bad Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Comment. This is my first ever work.

"I can take care of myself I don’t need coddling from you or anyone else." I said coldly. I knew I should calm down but I was annoyed. Everyone had noticed the tension between me and Reid. at first they only asked Reid about it but the looks everyone kept sending up the bullpen told me that would change soon. Reid didn’t reply he just looked at me blankly. When I just glared at him, he huffed in frustration.  
"Alright you don’t want my help that's fine." He pushed past me out of my office, leaving the food on the corner of my desk. The feeling of regret overwhelmed me. I wasn’t trying to push him away, but he wanted to talk about why I was acting out. Which I would rather not talk about. He seemed like he was reaching the end of his rope. I knew I was in the wrong, but I didn’t know how to say what I was feeling. At this point would he even listen. I rubbed my eyes till I saw stars and tried to refocus on my paper work. I wanted to get home at a reasonably time. I wasn’t sure if Spencer was still coming over. If I was him I wouldn’t. To think I was a grown man treating his partner like shit because I couldn’t handle a couple of bad dreams. The timer on my watch startled me enough to knock over my pencils. I forgot about my meeting with Strauss, the knock at my door told me she didn’t.  
*************  
By the time I got home it was past 8 and Spencer sat reading on the couch. He briefly acknowledged me then went back to his book. The hope that he wasn’t mad fled immediately leaving guilt in its wake.  
“I’m so-” He cut me off  
“Just go take a shower Hotch ” his tone was angry, but the use of my surname told me otherwise. I dropped my briefcase in the office and headed to the bathroom. I tried to be brief because I knew Spencer would want to talk and it would be better to address it now. I couldn’t help delay and spent extra time washing and cleaning up after I finished. I was horrible at arguments I had trouble speaking up and everyone took it for  
indifference. It not that want to cause argument. I wanted to talk to him but I probably would just make it worst. He had taken off his shirt and laid in bed bu the time I left the bathroom.  
“Are you hungry?” He asked. I shook my head slowly surprised by the question.  
“ Well then we need to talk. Would you like to go first.” He said it more as a command than a question. I took a deep breath and tried to start.  
“I, I haven’t, I don’t-” It was frustrating and made me feel stupid not being able to articulate. “I’m sorry. I’ve been horrible towards you and everyone noticed. Then I snapped at you and I wanted to apologize but I didn’t know how. I don’t know how to talk about my feelings and I always freeze. Or I get caught up. I’m just- I’m sorry. Really really sorry.” I let sucked in a breath while Spencer looked at me alarmed.  
“I asked Jess to take Jack this weekend" I already knew that Jessica had sent me a text earlier. He didn’t acknowledge what I said.  
“At first I thought maybe you wanted to break up.” I started to deny his thoughts but he held up his hand to stop me. “I know you don’t but you were pulling me away. I realize you don’t know this but about a week ago you were calling out in your sleep and when you woke up you thought I was still asleep. That’s when I realized why you were acting so weird.” He gave me the go head to speak but I was frozen. I had been falling apart all week and he knew. I was angry for a second. Then I realized why he didn’t say anything because he knew I would be embarrassed. He probably would have if I hadn’t been so horrible to him.  
“I understand why you didn’t say anything.” I hoped that would be enough to end the conversation but he wasn’t done  
"That doesn’t excuse the fact that you’ve snapped at me 8 times in the last three days , lied when I asked what was wrong and didn’t trust me to be here for you.” He sounded pissed.  
“I do trust you and I’m sorry. I should have come to you.” he still looked pissed but also concerned?  
“ Let me help you Aaron, be there for you?” We stared at each other for at least a minute. I didn’t know what to say. I hate talking, I can never find the right words.  
“I’m fine though Spencer. It just some bad dreams.” He groaned in exasperation  
“This isn’t healthy. You haven’t been sleeping and you’ve been drinking more " His voice was calm. “I love you and I want to spend my life with you. But you have to let me in." His voice comforted. He spoke like I was something that needed to be cared for  
"Your right. I've been tired and scared.I shouldn't have taken it out on you. Ever. I just didn’t know how to go to you. I know it’s horrible but I felt like you shouldn’t have to take care of me." He grabbed my hand.  
“Aaron I take care of you all the time.” He rolled his eyes. “I make your lunch most morning, give you massages when your stressed, help you with your paperwork. Do I need to go on?” He laughed at my expression which I knew probably look surprised. "What are they about?" He asked suddenly “Your dreams.”  
"I really don't want to talk about this. Please" I pleaded. He slowly nodded. I was surprised not talking wasn’t how Spencer did things. He thought communication was a big part of making a relationship work.  
“I was hoping you’d tell me because I thinking talking it out might help. I won’t force you though Aaron”He grabbed my face as he spoke.  
“Get in the bed we’ll go to sleep" He turned guiding me to the bed. I hesitated before laying on my side. I waited for him to turn off the lights and get in. "I’ve noticed you have less nightmares,” he said as the bed dipped as he crawled in behind me.  
"Spencer" I said pleadingly. As far as we had come in the conversation I didn’t want to admit that I needed to be coddled.  
"Do you want to be held." He questioned quietly. I only nodded not trusting my own voice. He slowly got closer and wrapped his arms around me. Pausing a little before tightening his hold. I couldn't help the low sound I made as I relaxed into his body. He laughed quietly causing my cheek to flame. It was slightly embarrassing that I couldn’t control myself. I was normally the one who held him. I probably would never admit it but, I liked it better this way. I felt protected and loved. At first it was relaxing but my brain would not stop whirling. I tried to stay still and not bother Spencer. Forty minutes in I started squirming. I managed to elbow Spence’s stomach and startle him awake.  
“Aaron?” He turned running his lips up my neck. Shivering slightly when he spoke in my ear. “Can’t sleep.” He started rearranging me till my head was on his chest. He ran his fingers through my hair and held me close. Not sure if it was his breathing or the steady drum of his heart but I was sleep in less than five minutes. I sleep straight through the night into late the next morning. Not a nightmare in sight.


End file.
